Helping your elderly loved-ones make difficult life transitions
Leawood, Kansas – Watching your parents go from family leaders to those who need your help isn’t easy. Yet you need to realize how fortunate you are to have the privilege to do so. Life expectancy is on the rise in the U.S., so we need to prepare for what that means for our parents. The following tips should make things easier when it comes time for your parent or parents to make these difficult life transitions:
1. Handing over the car keys. While the elderly often know deep in their hearts when they aren’t up to the task of driving safely, they often resist admitting it. Take them (and yourself) out of the equation and get a doctor’s evaluation. If it turns out to indeed be time to stop driving, help ease their concerns by researching transportation options to present to them.
2. Making a move. Whether your parent simply needs to downsize or it’s time for the move to assisted living, there are ways to help with this decision. To save you time and stress, hire an experienced professional to help with the research of living facilities and options in your area. Oftentimes, these professionals have access to resources and have first-hand knowledge of available facilities. Ask if these assisted living facilities allow trial visits so that your parent can stay a week or two before deciding to move. If your parent agrees to give it a go beyond the trial, don’t sell the house until you are sure the adjustment has been made. It can take up to four months to accept the change.
3. Relinquish power over finances. Ideally, your parents’ trust in you is intact so that doesn’t complicate an already difficult transition. However, you must be aware of their concerns and address them completely. Although you are likely more used to electronic banking and ATM’s than they are, assure your parents that you will keep them informed of your actions at all times. If possible, it may also help to use a personal banker – a service some banks provide at no charge – in order to handle any ongoing bank transactions. This is especially helpful if your parents are not comfortable with family discussions or decisions in regard to financial matters.
In any of these and other difficult life transitions , you will need to use your best psychology and do whatever it takes to put your parents’ anxiety to rest. If you start to lose patience, ask yourself how you would feel in their place. Remember that your mom and dad are adults and deserve your respect no matter what their limitations are and you’ll do just fine.
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Kansas City Homecare provides caregiver support services for seniors who need assistance with everyday living and want to live in their home. Our visiting caregivers can provide meals, implement health programs, run small errands and assist with light housekeeping. We are your choice for premium in-home care in the Kansas City area.
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